Something I enjoy writing is my very own Dream Beano – so here is my current one based off the current revamp.
For my Dream Beano, I want to be more realistic than usual when I’d give The Beano something like 58 pages so here is a 40 page Beano (that’s only 4 pages above the normal page count).
PG 1: Front Cover – Various
- As much as I like Nigel Parkinson’s artwork, it gets dull seeing Dennis the Menace forever heralding the front cover – I’d like to see some other characters get the limelight. A Fred’s Bed one and Meebo and Zuky one would both be quite dynamic I reckon due to their action. However, I do understand that Dennis is a household name so it’s a risk to remove him from the cover spot.
PG 2: Funsize Funnies #1:
- Derek the Sheep by Gary Northfield
- Biffo by Stephen Waller
- Fred the Flop by Andy Fanton
- Colonel’s Crackpot Circus by Will Dawbarn
- I feel that the more ‘Funsize Funnies’ pages included – the better! I chose the following for different reasons. I felt Derek the Sheep would work nicely in this format and it would also be nice to see Gary Northfield and Derek both back in the pages of The Beano. Biffo was included as he’s such a famous character and I loved his silent era – I also felt Biffo would be a great story for Stephen Waller. Fred the Flop is the black sheep of these four stories – a comic strip from Buzz and later on Topper and not too well-known. However, after seeing Constable Clod by Andy in The Dandy, I felt this story would be perfect to explore the opposite side, and let’s be honest, Andy had to draw it! Finally, another obscurity, Malcolm Judge’s first ever Beano strip, ‘Colonel’s Crackpot Circus’ of course being drawn by Will Dawbarn due to his incredible Billy Whizz and Badd Lads!
PG 3: What’s Inside?/Desert Island Dick by Nick Brennan
- A full contents page preferably, including a mini-strip of Topper classic, ‘Desert Island Dick’. I think that Dick would be a good addition to the comic!
PG 4: Dennis the Menace and Gnasher by Nigel Parkinson/Barrie Appleby/Steve Beckett (and Nigel Auchterlounie)
- Dennis the Menace stays pretty much the same – but I would like to see ‘the Menace’ being added to the title of the strip again. Maybe a new logo all together, the 2009 CBBC one has become old. I’d like a mixture of artists drawing Dennis the Menace as well; as much as I love Nigel’s Dennis – I would like to see Steve and Barrie both draw it at times.
PG 7: Win Awesome Stuff!
- I’ve started to accept competition pages will always remain in comics so will leave it in. It is a good non-comic strip page besides.
PG 8: Billy Whizz by Will Dawbarn
- If it’s not broken, don’t fix it…
PG 9: Number 13 by Laura Howell
- Following her great Number 13 story in The Beano Annual 2013, I’d like to see some new Number 13 stories by Laura in the weekly. After all, reprint or not – it was a great story!
PG 10: The Numskulls by Barry Glennard
- I prefer The Numskulls being near the front of The Beano as opposed to nearer to the back, it feels right being early on. Also feel Barry Glennard has done a brilliant job on The Numskulls for all these years so why stop him?
PG 12: Puzzle Page by Various/Advert
- Always liked the hand-drawn puzzle pages in The Dandy so would like to see them in The Beano as well drawn by different artists each week.
PG 13: Minnie the Minx by Nigel Parkinson/Ken Harrison/Laura Howell
- Something many may disagree on is that I’d keep Minnie at only one page. She doesn’t need to take up two pages to be funny! She’s been great so far at only one!
PG 14: Ratz by Hunt Emerson (and Laura Howell)
- I rather like Ratz and think it brings a different style of writing to The Beano quite nicely. Also really like Hunt Emerson’s urban art-style – but of course, Laura Howell would be back on writing duties!
PG 15: Funsize Funnies #2:
- Little Plum by Laura Howell
- Gnash Gnews by Barrie Appleby
- Foxy by Stu Munro
- Rasher by Lew Stringer
- Same mini-strips as usual on this page with the exception of Winston and the addition of Foxy by Stu Munro. The reason I decided to include Foxy was because I felt it would work nicely as a mini-strip and Stu Munro has a good style.
PG 16: New Strip by Jamie Smart
- Jamie needs a story in The Beano so a page is definitely reserved for him to go mad on! I think many younger Beano readers would love his style of humour as well!
PG 17: Super School by Lew Stringer
- Super School is a strip I really want to see back. It was fun and different plus Lew’s artwork was always nice to see. Certainly one I’d bring back.
PG 18: Jonah by Steve Beckett
- A Beano classic and one I reckon should definitely return! I think Steve Beckett would be capable of drawing an amazing Jonah as well!
PG 19: Ivy the Terrible by Andy Fanton
- Another story I reckon Andy would be good at! Ivy is such a strong character and I would really like to see the little terror back under the new pens of Mr. Fanton!
PG 20: The Bash Street Kids by David Sutherland
- Like with Billy Whizz, if it ain’t broken – don’t bother fixing it! Dave has been brilliant for all these years and I’d hate to see him stop now!
PULLOUT:
- Poster by Various
- Comic Strip by Various
- This is a new feature in The Beano I really love! What an ingenious idea! Although I think that they should make that if you get the comic – there’s a code inside to get delivered the poster itself so you can have both the comic strip to read and the poster to put up on your bedroom wall.
PG 22: Ball Boy by Dave Eastbury
- I know some people don’t like Ball Boy but I’ve always enjoyed Ball Boy! A fun look at football! Although get rid of Chandra already! So unneeded!
PG 23: The Beano Subscription Page/Advert
- Would like to see this looking a bit more exciting. Maybe a few hand-drawn subscriptions pages like in The Phoenix recently? Certainly makes the pages look more appealing!
PG 24: Dangerous Dan by Nigel Parkinson
- This “spy” must return! Honestly, the greatest surprise of all of 2011 (along with the return of Fatty Fudge). The strip felt mistreated and will probably never return – but still, I’m still backing it. Bring back Dangerous Dan!
PG 25: Funsize Funnies #3:
- Meebo and Zuky by Laura Howell
- The 3 Bears by Paul Palmer (and Nigel Auchterlounie)
- Joe Jitsu by Wayne Thompson
- Pansy Potter by Barry Glennard
- Four new ones. First is Meebo and Zuky which I’m growing tired of so would like to see it in a new format so we can have a variety! The 3 Bears are characters that simply must return – I can also imagine Paul Palmer being brilliant at drawing them – scripts by Nigel Auchterlounie. Joe Jitsu is an odd one to have but I like Wayne’s artwork and found Joe Jitsu was actually quite a good character who’d work well in a three-panel format. Finally Pansy Potter who I’ve always rather liked and who I think would once again work nicely in the three-panel format!
PG 26: Bananaman by Steve Bright (and Alexander Matthews)
- I’d like to see some new Bananaman stories with Alexander writing it with his unique humour and the amazing Brighty drawing it!
PG 28: The Dennis the Menace Fan Club
- I like readers’ pages in comics. They seem to work well, but I’d like to see them laid out a bit neater. Also the return of the actual Dennis the Menace Fan Club complete with the two badges! It was successful in the past and I’m sure many would love to see it back!
PG 29: Fatty Fudge by Jim Petrie (reprint)
- I have to be realistic and if there has to be a reprint in there, I’d like it to be this. Fatty Fudge was a fun character and seemed quite popular – popular enough to even get into the Christmas Beano 2011!
PG 30: Fred’s Bed by Alexander Matthews
- Fred’s Bed is a fun strip and works well at two pages so this definitely comes back with Alexander writing it with his unique humour and also drawing it in his appaealing style!
PG 32: Kick-Ass Koalas by Peter Player
- These koalas are simply awesome! They must be in the weekly! I really enjoyed them featuring in The BeanoMAX so would like to see them again!
PG 34: Johnny Bean from Happy Bunny Green by Laura Howell
- I honestly loved this strip so much and was upset to see it end. Would love to see it back at a page again replacing Meebo and Zuky.
PG 35: Jumpin’ with Jokes! by Nigel Auchterlounie
- I’m quite a fan of joke page when they’re drawn jokes like Stripz. Nigel is also a brilliant writer and has a fun style which would suit the wacky humour on this page.
PG 36: Roger the Dodger by Barrie Appleby
- Roger works nicely as it is so no editing required! But the border must return!
PG 38: Funsize Funnies #4:
- BSK: Singled Out by Paul Palmer (and Andy Fanton)
- Baby-Face Finlayson by Alexander Matthews
- Les Pretend by Laura Howell
- Pup Parade by Nigel Auchterlounie
- Basically the current cast on Funsize Funnies #2 but this time with the addition of BSK: Singled Out by Paul Palmer with scripts supplied by Andy Fanton. The rest stay the same as they’re all brilliant!
PG 39: Next Week in The Beano
- Same as it normally looks but with a striped background just so it doesn’t look as plain. Other than that, it’s perfect!
PG 40: The Riot Squad by Ken Harrison
- Finally on the back cover is The Riot Squad which I always really liked – reprints or not! Ken’s artwork is beautiful and he’s brilliant at these fun and busy scenes – a nice back page story as well I reckon!
So, there’s my Dream Beano – what do you think? Let me know in the comments below!
(Coming soon, a blog post about the new-look Beano!)
Until then, goodbye my friends!
- Harry Rickard
